The International Japanese

I have been in Japan for 4 1/2 months now. I have a good idea how most Japanese people are, how they interact etc. The problem I have, is with working out people who ARE more familiar with other cultures. I find it difficult to know how to behave, what I can and cannot talk about with them sometimes. Like Kawakami-sensei for instance. He has lived in Canada for 1 year and is therefore very familiar with western culture. There are many things he does differently from other Japanese people as a result. (In his classes, for example, his students don`t stand up and bow to him). I find him so hard to work out sometimes! And sometimes things are a bit funny (amusing) between us because I don`t really know what to expect!

Those people who are more westernized I do very much enjoy hanging out with though. I can be honest, and explain things to them in a very detailed way. (Although, I am also very honest with most people generally, because of my character).
But with the Japanese-Japanese, I can only be honest when the honesty is something that that person can relate to – that is either a cultural universal, or, something to do with Japan.

With the western-familiar Japanese, I can explain many other feelings that a Japanese person wouldn`t really understand if they hadn`t been outside of Japan – because they probably just can`t comprehend how different it is! (also, there is the significant factor that the Japanese-Japanese tend to have less good English than the internationalised Japanese, so it`s more difficult to explain from that point of view aswell).

I do enjoy being friends with both types of Japanese person though, definitely. As sometimes, the western Japanese can be a bit denigrative of certain aspects of Japanese culture (eg – Midorikawa-senssi: “I hate tea ceremony – it tastes so bitter!”. And sometimes I love it the Japanese-Japanese love to tell me about Japan, and I love to tell them what good aspects of Japan are new for me.

But, I do particularly enjoy being with the internationalized Japanese primarily, simply because they can relate to this life-changing experience I am having, living in a completely different culture.

Some international-Japanese people are so knowledgeable about western ways and western culture (due to a strong interest) that when talking to a western person, they want to try and adapt to the western way so much (to make the westerner feel comfortable I guess?!), that they almost have unrecognizable behavior for a Japanese person!

An example is the woman who sat in the front row of my speech. She was obviously very keen, and confident. She was so direct in her conversation – suggesting we should meet again, very quickly. So, I was surprised. But then I recovered myself quickly, and returned to her, equally direct conversation: “how about this weekend?” I think even she was surprised about the directness and immediacy of that! (That kind of directness is unusual for me – I wouldn`t be quite like that in England, but in Japan, in this country where you only meet people fleetingly, you have to take action to make friends. You have to be like this to make your connections here).

Anyway, the weekend was decided, and the characteristically UN-Japanese directness from her continued: “Lets meet, 12 o`clock, Mito station, south exit. OK?”. No voicing of the word “maybe” to be heard anywhere!! The lack of the word maybe in ANY conversation with a Japanese person is absolutely UNHEARD of usually.

She was so un-Japanese, in so many ways that I was laughing. But then, at the Kenya talk we attended, with all the other Japanese people in the room, I did notice her bowing profusely (as I do these days) as she met/ left people. I was reassured. She was in fact Japanese, … and not some kind of imposter!